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What Hinders Honest Conversations in Relationships?

We know that communication is extremely necessary to help any relationship to get thriving and functioning correctly. However, it is most important to know how to communicate in those relationships. I didn't know I had a communication defect until I connected with a person who didn't know how to communicate without frustration and initiation. I then, struggled with the words to say, how to say it and when to say it. This caused the "walking on eggshells" way of living, "swallowing words", avoidance and sometimes passive-aggressive communication. When someone is not prone to share their heart with another, in some way, honest conversations will not be made.

I am a practical person and one thing I am prone to do is ask "how to correct?" when the problem has been presented. I am no expert, but I've learned a few things along the way through the Word of God and practical application through experience. Below is a list of suggestions on what hinders the honest conversation.

What can hinder honest conversations?

  1. Lying. (duh, really?)

  2. Judging your spouse/mate

  3. Interrupting your spouse/mate during the conversation

  4. Making assumptions

  5. Lack of trust. Questioning their motives while being honest

  6. Overreacting. Pointing blame. By making the conversation more about them and less about you.

  7. Using the vulnerable information shared against them in an argument

  8. Sharing the vulnerable information outside of the relationship

  9. No empathy. Downplaying the honest conversation

  10. Not reciprocating the same honesty in the conversation


James 1:19 - Know this, my beloved: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger

Ephesians 4:29 - Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Proverbs 15:1 - A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Psalm 141:3 - Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!

Colossians 4:6 - Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you know how you are to answer each person.

Proverbs 18:2 - A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.

2 Timothy 2:16 - But avoid irreverent babble, for it will lead people into more and more ungodliness.

Proverbs 18:13 - If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.

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