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What Robs a Marriage of a Love Affair?

There are several reasons that can rob a marriage of a LOVE AFFAIR. Listed are some important points and scriptures that helps to bring attention to what affects our intimacy. When reading this, keep in mind of the things that not just one but both may be contributing and always work on yourself because we are the ONLY one that we can change.

CARES OF LIFE - job, bills, kids, health, family, appearance, etc.

  • But the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful. Mark 4:19

  • Do not be worried about the food and drink you need to stay alive, or about clothes for your body. After all, isn't life worth more than food? And isn't the body worth more than clothes? Look at the birds flying around: they do not plant seeds, gather a harvest, and put it in barns; your Father in heaven takes care of them! Mat. 6:25-26

  • Which one of you can live a few more years by worrying about it? And why worry about clothes? Look how the wildflowers grow: they do not work or make clothes for themselves. But I tell you that not even Solomon, as rich as he was, had clothes as beautiful as one of these flowers. It is God who clothes the wild grass--grass that is here today, gone tomorrow, burned up in the oven. Won't he be all the more sure to clothe you? How little faith you have! Mat. 6:27-30

  • So do not start worrying: 'Where will my food come from? or my drink? or my clothes?' (These are the things the heathen are always concerned about.) Your Father in heaven knows that you need all these things…. So do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings. Mat. 6:31-34

UNFORGIVENESS-the biggest root of all problems in relationships, holding grudges, offences

  • And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. Mark 11:29

  • Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Eph. 4:32

  • Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. Heb. 12:14

DEVALUING-no appreciation, lack of respect, no attention or affection, taking each other for granted

  • You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows. Malachi 2:14

  • Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit, you are His. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So, guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. “For I hate divorce!” says the Lord, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty” says the Lord. “So, guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.” Malachi 2:15

  • "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?" Ecc. 4:9

  • "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Eph. 5:22

  • “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ..." Eph. 5:25-33

  • Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. Philippians 2:3

SELFISHNESS-it's all about me, victimizing, narcissistic, not caring or considering the other

No one should seek their own good, but the good of others. I Cor. 10:24

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. James 3:16

The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these. Mark 12:31

DISTRACTIONS-emotionally, socially, electronically, by others, by self

  • “Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate." Mark 10:9

  • No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. I Cor. 10:13

  • I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways. Psalms 119:15

MIS-PRIORITIZING-unbalanced life, no order, selfish, too busy, poor planning, poor time management

  • “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." Gen. 2:24

  • Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. Prov. 16:3

  • So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12

  • But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. I Tim. 5:8

  • Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Eph. 5:15-16

  • For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church? I Tim. 3:5

FINANCES - worrying, workaholic, lack of, not budgeting, poor income to debt ratio, too much debt, etc

  • Whoever loves money never has enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with their income. This too is meaningless. Eccl. 5:10

  • Better the little that the righteous have than the wealth of many wicked Psalm 37:16

  • Dishonest money dwindles away, but whoever gathers money little by little makes it grow. Prov. 13:11

  • Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Heb. 13:5

  • “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Mat. 6:24

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